Put Her Before Work


Put Your Wife First

Doug Fields is executive director of HomeWord’s Center for Youth/Family at Azusa Pacific University.  Previously, he served in pastoral roles at South Coast Community Church (Mariners Church) and at Saddleback Church.  He frequently speaks on marriage, family parenting, and youth ministry topics.

Doug and his wife, Cathy, have three children.  He is the author of over 50 books including Purpose Driven Youth Ministry and 7 Ways to Be Her Hero – the source of this week’s readings.

Our culture paints the picture of a man’s man who is driven by thoughts of, I’ve got to close another deal.  I’ve got to sign another contract.  I’ve got to get that promotion.  I want what he has.  I’ve got to say yes to more.  I’ve got to say yes to the chase.

Sadly, we have bought into the cultural construct of manhood.  We are addicted to the chase.  We are busy, and our busyness validates our sense of importance.  Yet we, like Solomon before us, are chasing the wind (Eccl. 2:11).  We are too busy to notice that the chase is killing our souls, wounding our wives, and destroying our marriage.

Your wife may appreciate the lifestyle your chase can provide, but she likely would give it up in a heartbeat to have more of you in her life.  I am not suggesting you shouldn’t work hard, but I am suggesting that if you are defining your value by your ambition, your work, and your achievement, then you are simply chasing after the wind, and ultimately, it is meaningless.

Key Study Passage: Colossians 3:12-15

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